Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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