why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
