did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
