I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
