I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
