i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
We got so high we made milksteak
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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