what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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