i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
