That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
