I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
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