he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
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