I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
