I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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