His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Randomize
