Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize
