can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
