I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
You took a bar mat shot.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
