I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize