how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
The feeling are messing with the penis
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Randomize