I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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