Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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