Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
