I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
Randomize
