Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
