I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
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