did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Randomize
