All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Randomize
