they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Randomize
