Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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