the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
what is it with giant penises always finding me
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
