i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Randomize
