A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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