I cheated on you last night. I slept with my laptop.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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