just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Randomize
