But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Randomize
