You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Randomize
