Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
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