Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
I don't think brook has ever known best
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize
