My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
Last time i carry you out of a forest
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
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