Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
