Me too!
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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