I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
True strength comes from lack of pants
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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