You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
