so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
