I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
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