She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize