Your tits are I can't wait for
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
