you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
my god I love twenty year old dicks
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Randomize