batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
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