I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
I am mentally ready for anal.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
