I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize